Friday, December 31, 2010

Have A Blast(er)!

Igor has something to say to You.
Have a happy new year!

Friday, December 24, 2010

Holiday Special.

Igor's little helper called for attention, because he had something to announce.
Igor had no idea what was happpening.
"Who are all these droids?" He asked.
"Well, while you were in Seattle, I built myself a small droid army." The small robot said and continued:
"They immediately went out to search for bounties and now they're back."
"So consider this a christmas present from us"

"Wow" Igor didn't know what to say.
But the lil' droid knew just what to say:
"Open it!"
So Igor sat down and started opening his present.
"This is soo exciting!"
"Wow. You guys are the best!"
"It's a Han Solo frozen in carbonite!"
"Cool!" Igor said just before he attacked the small droid army while yelling:
"Group hug!"
And the small pile of droids could be heard saying:
"Merry christmas Igor!"

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Gävle Goat

Igor is up to no good. Again.
I told him to stop ruining christmas but he only answered:
"I'm not ruining anything, I am keeping a tradition alive"


[For non-swedish readers, click HERE for an explanation]

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Call Off Christmas.

As a true hunter Igor mounted the deer on his wall.
Igor telling children that Santa must get a replacement deer.
Igor can obiously not tell the difference between a red deer and a reindeer.
Let's not tell him that, it might break his little CPU.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

True Nature

Igor went out skiing in the woods when all of a sudden.
This was an opportunity too good to miss.

Igor quickly pulled out his sniper rifle.
Really taking his time aiming it at the target.

"There..."















BANG!!!













Igor quickly skis over too see if he did hit anything with his shot.


















"Oh yes! It's definitely not a miss"
"I just have to follow the blood trail in the snow to find the bastard" Igor said, and I could tell by the tone of his voice just how excited he was.



















"Lots of blood, we're close now!"
















....and...























..Igor found his prey.
"WIN!!"
"I will put this one on my wall back home. It's my first ever kill."
You just couldn't doubt how satisfied this assassin droid sounded while saying that.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Snow Day.

Igor had been nagging on me for quite some time now.
He wants to go out and play in the snow.
And I let him out.

But it did not take long before he yelled at me for help.
Well, well, well. Igor fell right through the fluffy snow.

So he had to do something about that.
"Skis should solve the problem!" He told me.
Good thing that he could borrow some skis from his friend Snow Job.


At first it was kind of hard to master these new funny looking long shoes.

Soon enough Igor had perfected his skiing skills and told me that he was going out for a big adventure in the snowy landscape.

To be continued...

Friday, December 3, 2010

Negative Energy.

After noticing the melancholy Igor was suffering from I decided to do a check up on his system.

I think I found soucre of the problem.
There was a huge sick component that that polluted his thoughts.
A picture of the droid confronting the problem.
Igor says: "Stay away from sick components kids!"

After that Igor said that he wanted to try out  the new giant treadmill.
Igor said that treadmills must be the stupidest things ever.
"You run but you don't get anywhere, whats the deal about that? Bah!"

But Igor got all worked up when I told him about the plans I have arranged for him.
He quickly ran away and just shortly after he yelled:
"HEY! You know? This is going to be..."
"...EPIC!"

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Working Classed Robot.

Igor's stuck in the life of an everyday man.

You know the routine:

Boot.
Reboot.
Go to work.
Do your thing.
Take the commute back home.
Stare out the train window in silence, and try to figure out why you shouldn't just go home and push your OFF-button.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Transition Machine.

This weekend Igor decided to go visit an exhibition. He said it was some kind of art for robots. The exhibition he went to is called Transition Machine[click LINK to read the artist's own words about it].
Here you can see just how excited the assassin droid got.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Stronger Than Ever.

Well. Igor and me went to a concert with swedish hardcore band Raised Fist yesterday.
Everyone knows that if you go to a concert you have to drink beer.

Igor had never tasted beer before
He therefore decided to try it out and have a sip.
As always with beer. A sip is never a sip.
He dove head first into the beer, and I had to rescue him quickly so thet he wouldn't short ciruit or anything.
Igor moaned.
"Can somebody wipe off this foam?"
Me and my friends just laughed at the hilarious scene.
"It's really not as fun as it seems."
And we kept laughing´.
"Please?"
And about here we took a napkin and helped him.

Oh yes. There was a band playing.
At concerts you have to be front row. That's what it's all about.
So Igor clawed and elbowed his way to the front.
Igor was all excited about intensity of the band and kept banging his fist in the air.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Recharged Power.

Today was the day when Igor returned from his visit to the Space Needle.

And he also brought something home with him.
This is the vision of Igor ruling the post apocalyptic world.
Igor's new friend Craig sent this amazing photo with Igor.
It's really something else to see live and not through a computer screen I can tell you that.
There's a really glossy metallic feeling about the background almost reminiscent of a 3D-picture.
Like I said. Amazing.
This is something I must frame and hang on my wall.

Igor was tired after the long trip and I believe that he suffers from jetlag.
Anyway, after posing for this picture, Igor went straight to his recharge station to take what he called a 'power nap'.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

I've Made a Lot of Special Modifications Myself.

So.

Guess what.

Igor is nine time zones away and he has something to say:











"Hi everyone!"
"I'm checking out the Space Needle in Seattle, Washington, USA."
"Bet you didn't guess I'd be here, did you?"


"Here, check this out!"
"I'll try to lift off the top of it."
"Gnnnhhhh!"
"Uuunnnhhh"
"Okay, I admit. Maybe it was just a bit too heavy for me."

"I'm kind of exhausted from trying to lift it so I'll just lean against it for a while and gather my breath."

And when he had done that he decided to go up in the Space Needle to check out the view of Seattle.
"It's really something special up here. Believe me"

"Hey, look at me! This is just like my favorite scene from 'Dr Strangelove or How I Learned To Stop Worrying About The Bomb'."
"I am Major Igor Kong, Haha!"

All of a sudden the camera showed  how the landscape would look post the apocalypse that Igor will bring to the world. A sky set on fire while robots rule the earth.


"Help! Help! There's a spaceship following me in the sky!"
"I have to run away from it!"


After visiting the Space Needle Igor had some actual business to attend.
He had a meeting scheduled in the largest building(by volume) in the world.
It's the Boeing factory, which you can see in the background.
"If there's a place on this planet where there's potential to build a huge huge spaceship, this would be it"
"Now I'll just have to ask them to build me a Death Star."
"And if they can't, I'll catch the first flight home."






[Slusk's note: A huge thank you beyond words goes out to my friend Craig Damlo who made this possible. Check out his great photos on flickr by clicking HERE]
Don't forget to click on the pictures for a close up.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The Droid Factory.

Since Igor is away I decided to let the small droid come with me to my work today.
He asked about some spare parts(trash) that were just lying around. I told  him that he could take whatever he found and play with it.

And did he ever find interesting things.
This is him assembling some of the parts he found.


He kept building..
...and building until he had no more parts to build with.
Here's a picture of his hard day at work.
A small droid army of his own. Complete with two more advanced models which he called 'elite assassin droids. I think he was referring to the two black ones, but I didn't want to make a fool of myself by asking stupid questions.
"You think Igor will like them?" he asked me.
"For sure, but only if you send them out to collect a bounty or two for him."

He turned to the droids and spoke his message loud and clear:
"You droids go out and find me a big, fat, juicy bounty!"

Boy, oh boy.
These small stupid droids will probably fill my apartment with small pieces of chocolate.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Apparent Lack of Progress.

After a very exciting adventure the little robot finally came home.
Only to find that his master had left him a note.
I asked the little robot if he knew anything more about Igor's whereabout but he simply said 'no' and that he should probably just go on with the big plan to take over the world. Whatever that is supposed to mean.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Small Droid On An Epic Mission.

---Transmission received---

This was the first thing I saw when I arrived to this planet.
It was horrible. Igor did not train me to deal with these monsters. Damn you Igor!
Anyway. This horrid creature was a bit annoying at first. But we got along very quickly.
And soon this furry tribe of local inhabitants would even help me in my search.
I started to investigate this place to see if there was anything that supported the intel about a sith lord being here.
I found some very disturbing plans. I most surely believe that it was plans for building a new Death Star.
I hope Igor can help me with all this technical mumbo jumbo.

It was a vast space to search but I found an icy cave where they had some weird fuel that contained very low alcohol rate.
I tried to ruin it but the containers were just to hard to break open.
This was also in the same cave. Knox. Knox. Is this where the keep all the gold?
I couldn't tell. These containers were sealed shut and I was not able to open them even with the help of my blaster.

All of a sudden I heard some splashing noise, and I decided to check out what was causing it.
It came from a separate sector in this huge complex.
I enabled the assassin droid special stealth mode and crawled up on what seemed to be a helipad of some sort.

And there he was! I had located this sought after sith lord.






.











..











...











It was with as much caution I could gather, that I snuck away to a place where he would not find me.

After this cleaning ritual he just put himself through, I stalked him some more. I really wanted to see what he was up to.

This is him working on a huge mainframe. He was probably ordering parts to the Death Star we think he's building.

I still was not 100 percent sure that he was the sith lord we're after, so when he went to sleep I made a decision to go through his personal belongings.
Could it be?





Wait for it..





...wait for it..




YES!

It is  the dreaded Sith Lord K.


Oh My F*cking Holy Assembler!

I must make contact with Igor as soon as possible!

---Transmission Ended---




[writers note: A huge thank you goes out to the one person who took all these pictures. I am truly grateful.]